8 year old, 9 year old, whatever - it is still wrong man. Get a grip - wait till they are 16, then stop them doing their homework.

you are a homo - oh and an indecisive tw*t

Failure With Girls


I`ve got an ugly face,
With spots all over the place,
I haven`t got any mates,
And me clothes have gone out of date.

I go to the pub on me own,
And I drink me orange alone,
I sit and stare at the crack,
But they just turn their backs.

I want to chat them up,
But I stare at me feet,
And then I go home and I beat me meat.
I`m dead shy about the size of me dick,
And chips and gravy make me sick.

I`m a failure with girls,
I don`t know why,
He`s a failure with girls,
He don`t know why.
I`m a failure with girls,
They`re so unkind,
He`s a failure with girls,
They`re so unkind.
I`m a failure with girls,
They make me cry,
He`s a failure with girls,
They make him cry.
Only wish I could say that I don`t mind.


A Macc Lad of me took note,
And he poured a pint of bitter down me throat,
It were the first pint I ever had,
And I changed to a real Macc Lad.
Me clothes started looking real flash,
I got a tattoo and a moustache,
And me car got a go-faster stripe,
And now I pull crack every night.

And I`m not weak anymore,
`Cos me dick measures three foot four,
So don`t you call me wimp,
`Cos it`s three foot four even when it`s limp.

I`m dead macho with girls,
I never fail,
He`s dead macho with girls,
He nevers fails.
I`m dead macho with girls
`Cos I sup ale,
He`s dead macho with girls
`Cos he sups ale.
I`m dead macho with girls
Thanks to Willies,
He`s dead macho with girls
Thanks to Willies.
Only wish I didn`t have VD


Courtesy of the Macc Lads

Originally Posted by Flashman07

This started off as a perfectly innocent thread about me wanting to ram my hairdresser (Its not gay lots of men have them nowadays) and now my hetrosexuality is in question. I didnt expect to be insulted so viciously by members of ARRSE and my feelings are extremely hurt...

...not gay.

"What did you honestly expect?"

Originally Posted by Dashing_Chap

I'm looking to move out of my flat too, could you post a pic of her & her contact details Then I'll get back to you with a reply...


-DC

DC,
Pop along and take 200 Paracetamol with plenty of water.
There's a good chap.

Originally Posted by Flashman07

Oh wise, wise ARRSErs I beg for your infinite knowledge and advice in my hour of need!

My situation is this, I still live with the parents and I am looking to move out. I live in Essex but work in Camden so my commute takes about an hour.

I have been offered by my hairdresser to live with her in her flat for a measley £250 a month in rent. My hairdresser is incredibly hot along with her friends who she invites round regularly and I would not hesitate to give her a good seeing to.

This aside her flat is in purfleet, which will add an extra 20 mins to my journey every morning and will also cost me a bit more in travel. Not to mention I will actually have to pay for my own food leaving me with less money at the end of the month. To top it all off Purfleet (by all accounts) is a s*** hole.

What should I do?!

"Was you born stupid?................or did you take a course?"

It's abit of a no brainer. If you were straight you would already have your toothbrush in her bathroom ;)

I somehow think that now you've posted a private photo of her publicly on a site full of squaddies....


All

Bets

Are

Off.



Someone will tell her, then she'll get "Dwayne" and his 3 big black mates round to sort you out.

Post the full pic you hermer, thats you to her left wearing one of her cast-offs.