ARmy Rumour SErvice

**Closet_Jibber** · 13-01-2009, 23:22

Having just returned to my castle after visiting a Lady friend I recieved a text message.

It states:

"I can't walk at all. I'm aching... :P"

Now putting aside that I feel like a legend when they say that and I feel the need to share it and lets look at the genuine issue here.

Does she really expect some kind of sympathy? Does she think I care whether she has to use a shop Mobility scooter to get about the house?

Or does she realise that it was my intention to inflict pain as I really don't like her at all but just wanted to empty my spuds and that by telling me this I might be tempted to go and do the same thing again tomorrow rather than next week?

In Short:

Do women know that we're trying to damage them?
Have we been bubbled by some sh1t Girly teen magazine?
Do we need a new plan?

**spike7451** · 13-01-2009, 23:26

C_J,
You're starting to worry us....
You're turning into MDN!

**DozyBint** · 13-01-2009, 23:29

Originally Posted by Closet_Jibber

Have we been bubbled by some sh1t Girly teen magazine?

How old is the chick you've just invalided?

**The_Seagull** · 13-01-2009, 23:34

Did you take her out running then?

**Closet_Jibber** · 13-01-2009, 23:34

She's atleast double figures I'm sure... Think. :s

Twenty Five in all seriousness. Which makes me wonder as she's not quite old enough to be of the Old School that no the score just yet.

Well unless that big bastard outside in the Peach coloured suit was actually her pimp.

I won't be impressed if I have this wrong and she actually wants sympathy. Next she'll want paying. I may steal one of her shoes to make myself feel better next time.

**bovvy** · 13-01-2009, 23:34

I think she's just telling you she enjoyed it.

I think she's paying you a compliment .... and, maybe, asking for more.

And you are just bragging.

**labrat** · 13-01-2009, 23:35

Is she only unable to walk because she received crush injuries from your fat gut pressing her down into the bed?

**DozyBint** · 13-01-2009, 23:38

Originally Posted by Closet_Jibber

I may steal one of her shoes to make myself feel better next time.

Don't steal it, just shit in it and wipe your cock on the curtains like any self-respecting hetero-tiger.

As for damaging her, next time kidney punch her so she really knows pain.

**Closet_Jibber** · 13-01-2009, 23:39

Originally Posted by bovvy

I think she's just telling you she enjoyed it.

I think she's paying you a compliment .... and, maybe, asking for more.

And you are just bragging.

I know that - I'm a bloke, its what we do. You don't honestly think when he said "I won't tell anyone in work" that he didn't now do you?

The Video will probably already be on You Porn with him saying "Check Out my Christmas Simpson Socks."

However back to the point.

How did they work it out??? As I suspect her evil plan may have worked on a lesser man. (By lesser man I mean non-lazy man)