Originally Posted by Flashman07

I've been trawling through the forums and it doesn't look like there has been a topic on this but apologies if there is.

Soo today is my first day back in work since the Christmas party (very little of which i remember). My whole day so far has consisted of being humiliated by the events of the evening including being unable to coherently speak, telling one of my work colleagues I wanted to shag her, dancing like a complete tit, telling my current manager that my previous manager is fitter than she is, spilling drinks over people, vomiting and just generally making an arse out of myself.

Anyone else have similar or worse drunken Christmas experiences? Anything that helps to salvage whats left of my self respect would be greatly appreciated.

Sounds like my usual Sunday routine, but without the dancing bit.

I once shagged a fat ginge from the accounts dept on a Christmas night out. I enlisted immediately afterwards in the hope no one would find out.

Nah, work Christmas dos are grim, grim, grim. The kind of people I work for are mostly too stingy to lay one on anyway, but I used to get dragged to the ex's Slovak Railways black tie. Cringeworthy without fail but eventually quite funny. Starts with everyone behaving like they've got a lemon up their bum, but by about 1.00am the inhibition barriers are down, the serious booze is in full flow and the zany folk dancing and other antics break out. Never seen it through to the end as the kitchen dragon always dragged me away before time was called. She can read the signs.

The posh do was boring, me and some others had clearly been put on the naughty table. The christmas quiz was even worse, I drank more to get through it. By 0130 my husband had been called to collect me and put me to bed. I didn't even know I had eaten a chicken kebab with garlic sauce. That was until I was sick in the sink at work the next day, and had to force it down the plug hole with my finger. According to those that remember I (amongst other things) drank 4 bottles of red, one of which I stole off the CO.

I met a lady at a work party recently, who claimed the year before at said event at her boss' house, that she had vomited on his children.

Must have been very good at her job.

Originally Posted by milsum

I met a lady at a work party recently, who claimed the year before at said event at her boss' house, that she had vomited on his children.

Must have been very good at her job.

Brilliant I'll remember that for next year.

Oh shit!

Arrrgh.....Oh no...The Photos.......the Secretary with the big tits....My wife and the Internet!

I am Undone (but it was fun!)

Well I am going to have a sh1t christmas having been caught - shagging my neighbours wife in the garden shed/outhouse thing. It all got a little out of hand!!

Originally Posted by milsum

I met a lady at a work party recently, who claimed the year before at said event at her boss' house, that she had vomited on his children.

Must have been very good at her job.

Not Home Sec is she (actually forget that-the good at the job bit gives it away)

Originally Posted by milsum

I met a lady at a work party recently, who claimed the year before at said event at her boss' house, that she had vomited on his children.

Must have been very good at her job.

These wretched parties are a professional minefield....... you can lose your name and a lot more besides very quickly. Fortunately, years of training have kept me on the side of righteousness, unlike a colleague some years ago at a large office party which the above very much reminds me of.

After some steady drinking, dancing and so on, said friend was invited into an empty room by a wayward secretary who to his delight fell to her knees. He dropped his trousers and was in heavenly bliss for all of 35 seconds until she gagged and threw up into his trousers around his ankles.

Messy, smelly and very very undignified for both concerned.