ARmy Rumour SErvice

Guy I did some medical training with when I was a sprog, total bigtiming ultra cunt no-mark. Just a dick on an hourly basis.

Was approached by a company I was working for and asked if he was suitable for gainful employment within the organisation. Revenge revenged. Fuck you you skinny jock cunt I hope you are still unemployed.

Beware who you see off, you career ladder climbing, sell out cunts, once you are outside in the big bad world you never know who might be file 13ing your CV

And the blue hatted matelot Dento who got me charged for missing a dental appointment at 40, despite the fact that the cunt was serving me spuds at the unit christmas dinner/pissup/food fight

After a fantastic night out in Camberley (I met a girl who appeared to want to indulge in some sort of sexual activity with me). I was supposed to head back to London but a mate told me I could stay at his place near Sandhurst. I had a few more drinks with my female 'short term friend' but my mate headed off home. He told me to ring the bell when I got back with the girl - and that the spare room had a double bed. Yeeehah!

After a painful taxi ride back with the young lady getting more and more impatient - I wasn't eaxctly sure where the house was - and the driver kept racking the fare up - I finally got to my mates house. I jumped out into the rain and rang the bell. No reply. I kept ringing but nothing - he'd clearly passed out.

My overnight entertainment lost her rag and told the driver to take her home leaving me in the rain outside my sleeping mate's house. I noticed an upper floor window was open and being cold and pissed off I climbed onto the porch to try and gain entrance. After about 30 mins of dangling my belt to hook the latch I gave up and jumped down.... into the arms of a couple of Surrey Constabulary's finest.

I was arrested for attempted breaking and entry and transported to Camberley Police station to spend the night in the cells. Eventually (at about 0700) I was able to persuade the desk sgt to ring the house to confirm my story. Yes, my mate had been at home all the time and claimed to not to have heard me ringing. I never found out who rang the fuzz to report an intruder but I have my suspicions.... The fucking bastard.

Most recently embuggered by NatWest/RBS. Debit card still non functional, account shows £0.00 balance

Reminded me of situation following parting of ways with Mrs Blogg Mk I. Fucked over does not even begin to cover that misery

The WO2 who as well as being a mate of mine ran off with Frau Jones the 1st and caused me a fucking nightmare of problems with the army.

But, and there is always a but....

She booted him out 10 years later and he died in Bridgend in 2002.

Could have been suicide, dunno but dead is dead.

So that's alright then.

Originally Posted by EScotia

I've been fucked over so many times in 36 years that my ring piece resembles the Dartford Tunnel

Originally Posted by h301593

Congested and full of cunts?

It would work better if you'd said congested and full of cocks. Just saying...

Many years ago as a schoolboy in a certain military themed school in SE Kent I got f****d off by the young schoolgirl I was supposed to be going out with. She dumped me for a mate. Jump forward about 6 yrs and I am now stationed in Berlin and she is now in 6th Form College in Richmond. Her Dad is with a certain Berlin based unit and she is on school holiday. Meet up, night of drinks on the town and then back to my bunk. Best grudge f**k I ever had, could only have been bettered if I had put her up against a pebble dash wall.

On my last 6 weeks in green CO called me would you like an extension for another year we will not need you to deploy just sort the rear party.
Checked with Mrs LLTQ and got the ok signed the paper work etc etc all well.
Phone call on a weekend from Adjt can you pop in for a chat chat turned in to you are fliying out next week WO2 jack bastard can not deploy and you are taking his place hope you do not mind.
Now I'm not one to get pissed of with the military but this was jack I had not long come back from telic being on attachment.
Any deployed with the Battalion and returned 7 weeks later via aero med with a fucked back not a happy chap.
It later turned out that WO2 Jack Bastard Was granted comp leave over his wife threatening to leave him if he deployed he had the leave and took over my ex job on rear party and from what I heard started to shag any thing he could get his hand on around the patch, Which I think is a tad low knowing where the lads were and his wife did not leave him.
Now my wife even though she is the bride of Satan and we hate each other with a passion stuck by me and nursed me back to health well sort of she was chuffed that I had lost my balls for some reason.Alas now I have MS and a shit load of other things wrong.
WO2 Jack Bastard never came to visit in Hostpital or home.
It's ironic in a way at the arse end of last year I was chatting to a chap over the road who is the manager of a small transport company he new of my old regiment and asked me about WO2 Jack Bastard who he had interviewed and was going to get a good job pending references , Strangly enough exWO2 Jack Bastard did not get the job he now works on a till at the co op.

Originally Posted by The_Snail

Me: "Where the fuck is Waterbeach?".

Not far from Leeming.