Originally Posted by wommit

Originally Posted by 570mils

Ok need some advice regarding the mk1 version wife.

Does anyone know of a way that a Blackberry mobile phone can record in call conversations when the phone is obviously in use? Evidence issues required regarding master570 and little miss570.

Many thanks and greatly appreciated.

Shall also try the NAAFI for a wider audience and possible response but do not expect too many sensible replies their, but worth a shot

570

And a proud grammar nazi too.

How about using 'there' next time?

Mea Culpa.

Missed that one through steamed up goggles of frustration.


Insecurity is not the issue just a means to cover my arrse really.

She has consistently changed details, failed to appear......i could go on but you get the picture. I need to demonstrate the obstructive way that she controls access to OUR children. It's hard to hold her to anything when you cannot demonstrate the original agreements and far be it for me to disrupt her own fantasy reality.

And it appears there was an implication to rec ord her phone, not at all, just mine to ensure clarity. If she requires she can certainly have copies or transcripts, hard for her to deny her part then.

Many thanks

570

Originally Posted by 570mils

Originally Posted by wommit

Originally Posted by 570mils

Ok need some advice regarding the mk1 version wife.

Does anyone know of a way that a Blackberry mobile phone can record in call conversations when the phone is obviously in use? Evidence issues required regarding master570 and little miss570.

Many thanks and greatly appreciated.

Shall also try the NAAFI for a wider audience and possible response but do not expect too many sensible replies their, but worth a shot

570

And a proud grammar nazi too.

How about using 'there' next time?

Mea Culpa.

Missed that one through steamed up goggles of frustration.


Insecurity is not the issue just a means to cover my arrse really.

She has consistently changed details, failed to appear......i could go on but you get the picture. I need to demonstrate the obstructive way that she controls access to OUR children. It's hard to hold her to anything when you cannot demonstrate the original agreements and far be it for me to disrupt her own fantasy reality.

And it appears there was an implication to rec ord her phone, not at all, just mine to ensure clarity. If she requires she can certainly have copies or transcripts, hard for her to deny her part then.

Many thanks

570

Keep a diary of events and, where possible, confirm arrangements in writing. If you write saying As previously agreed in our Telephone conversation of .......... I shall be picking Chardonnay and Percivale up from ....... at ...........

As soon as you personally put that in a post box you have a contract, the terms of which are accepted unless she replies to amend the terms of the contract.
If, after written confirmation of the arrangements, she fails to attend or make your children available then make a note of that. She can only cite last minute emergencies once or twice before a judge will see she is using the children as a weapon against you.

Originally Posted by Markintime

As soon as you personally put that in a post box you have a contract, the terms of which are accepted unless she replies to amend the terms of the contract.

So if I stick a demand for £500 through your letterbox and you throw it in the bin, can I see you in court?

Thought not.

MSR

Also - If they ARE called Chardonnay and Percivale - you don't deserve to see them!

Have you thought about CAFCASS? They are appointed by the court to see to the childs wishes. The best way is to have a contact order through the courts if she is being obstructive. Be aware that they are VERY Pro Mum (at least the one near me is) and that the very nature of compromise is going to leave one or both Parents feeling that they did not get what they wanted.

It will go, Court, Parents can't agree, Cafcass are notified by the court, Cafcass see both parents and the Children (without EITHER parenty there) Cafcass report back to the court and a Contact Order is made with the Childs wishes taken into account.

Unless you are a horrible parent I don't see any Child saying "I can't be arsed seeing him anymore". Once you have the Contact agreement it should be gravy. Speaking from experience I would ensure that the order contains within it that any changes to arrangements must be notified (x) days in advance. We have 7 days in ours.

One last thing, be flexible. The Judge will wave a big stick around if both Parents arrive with their t!tty lip stuck out, and as the Dad you will always be the loser.

To sum up, if there iis genuinely no middle ground, get Cafcass in. They will at least ensure that the Children get what they want.

Originally Posted by msr

Originally Posted by Markintime

As soon as you personally put that in a post box you have a contract, the terms of which are accepted unless she replies to amend the terms of the contract.

So if I stick a demand for £500 through your letterbox and you throw it in the bin, can I see you in court?

Thought not.

MSR

If it was part of previous discussions then yes, you may, especially if the letter tells me when I should pay by.

Originally Posted by Markintime

Originally Posted by msr

Originally Posted by Markintime

As soon as you personally put that in a post box you have a contract, the terms of which are accepted unless she replies to amend the terms of the contract.

So if I stick a demand for £500 through your letterbox and you throw it in the bin, can I see you in court?

Thought not.

MSR

If it was part of previous discussions then yes, you may, especially if the letter tells me when I should pay by.

Whatever

Originally Posted by 570mils

Ok need some advice regarding the mk1 version wife.

Does anyone know of a way that a Blackberry mobile phone can record in call conversations when the phone is obviously in use? Evidence issues required regarding master570 and little miss570.

Many thanks and greatly appreciated.

Shall also try the NAAFI for a wider audience and possible response but do not expect too many sensible replies their, but worth a shot

570

I had a very similar problem myself which took a great deal of time and expense via solicitors to sort out.

What I did, which worked out well and my solicitor said was ok at the time, was to say very early on in writing and verbally that anything she said or sent (texts etc) to me would might be recorded and passed to my solicitor or the police (I had received death threats amongst other pleasantries ) . She soon forgot this, thought I was bluffing or just didn't care what she said and I made sure that all my side of the conversations etc were squeeky clean, rational and calm (with immense difficulty on occasions ).

Once sent, I then kept a copy of all texts (too and from and kept a notebook of what was said between us including times and dates which IS, I am informed, allowed to be used in court and will be regarded as evidence in such matters. To further ensure that that evidence was not open to being rubbished as falsified after the events by her or her solicitor, I also sent a copy to my solicitor and asked for a time date receipt for each log so that they had a day by day record of events as well. Check for the up to date position on this with your solicitor not us bunch of well meaning amateurs on here

I did record conversations all texts etc (including those from her friends and boyfriends at the time) and still retain these several years after the events; they are my insurance policy and will be enought to convict her should anything 'unexpected' happen to me.

As has already been suggested above, I would also confirm everything in writing. Whilst I don't think it creates a legally binding contract, it DOES give you very powerful ammunition in court about what was and was not said and, may also be useful at CAFCASS (although in my experience, CAFCASS were more interested in getting through as many cases as possible rather than sorting out the reasons why my children were beingwe would both have to be bound by) your experience may well be different - I hope so!.

PM me if you have any more questions.

The contract I was describing had already been agreed verbally and it was being confirmed in writing. There are two reasons for this, firstly if she is flustered or unsure of what was said on the phone then it is a written record that both parties can agree to and secondly it formalises the arrangement.

Originally Posted by Markintime

The contract I was describing had already been agreed verbally and it was being confirmed in writing. There are two reasons for this, firstly if she is flustered or unsure of what was said on the phone then it is a written record that both parties can agree to and secondly it formalises the arrangement.

I believed that as well but was informed by my solicitor that trying to enforce such an agreement was almost impossible and the best way forward (in may case) was to do exactly what you suggested but be prepared to have it trampled all over

To add, it MAY be a legal contract BUT, a contract that is almost un-enforceable is a waste of space except as evidence later on

Originally Posted by msr

Originally Posted by Markintime

Originally Posted by msr

Originally Posted by Markintime

As soon as you personally put that in a post box you have a contract, the terms of which are accepted unless she replies to amend the terms of the contract.

So if I stick a demand for £500 through your letterbox and you throw it in the bin, can I see you in court?

Thought not.

MSR

If it was part of previous discussions then yes, you may, especially if the letter tells me when I should pay by.

Whatever

Where's the proof that the the original verbal discussion/agreement took place though?

You implied that anything could be put into the letter so long as it stated "as previously agreed in our telephone conversation...." but all she'd have to do is say that conversation never took place or that was not what was agreed on.