Thread: WWFE (Worst War Film Ever)

'Errol Flynn also starred in a controversial film , Objective Burma , in which he , almost single handed , pushed the Japs out of Burma'

To be fair, 'Merrill's Marauders' (1962) did actually make it clear that the main effort in Burma was British (or at any rate British/Imperial). I've watched it, it's OK:

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0056234/

Originally Posted by weekend_worrier

'Errol Flynn also starred in a controversial film , Objective Burma , in which he , almost single handed , pushed the Japs out of Burma'

To be fair, 'Merrill's Marauders' (1962) did actually make it clear that the main effort in Burma was British (or at any rate British/Imperial). I've watched it, it's OK:

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0056234/

I have seen the film Operation Burma and it is also watchable however although it was produced in 1945 there was such an outcry in the UK that it was not shown here until 1952 .

The colour re-make of 'All quiet on the western front'

If it ain't broke don't fix it!

I've also caught up with Enemy at the gate, ye Gods! I didn't do sniping, but even I wondered about positions with no alternative exit, going to get dog tags, etc etc, and no snow! How Jude Law got a reputation as an actor amazes me.

Got to be Windtalkers or whatever it was called.......

Nicholas Cage playing himself again........ only good part was the Injun bloke who was in Bury My Knee and Wounded Heart , or something

rest of it was pure shiote.

Originally Posted by Goldbricker

Originally Posted by DarkNinja

Behind Enemy Lines 2!

Oh dear god, they made a Sequel?

They made a third. I've seen it and its worse than the first two put together.

Originally Posted by Border_Reiver

Originally Posted by weekend_worrier

'Behind Enemy Lines 2!'

The first one was pretty s**t as well. .......

....... And if we are talking about how film-makers represent our military past, the 1968 version of 'The Charge of the Light Brigade' (which was ours) was a hell of a lot more accurate and less gung-ho than the Errol Flynn version (which was Hollywood's).

Well no surprise there ... Errol Flynn also starred in a controversial film , Objective Burma , in which he , almost single handed , pushed the Japs out of Burma . Further the Americans made a film , U 571 , about Enigma in which they captured an Enigma Machine from a German Submarine .... the fact that it was we , the Brits , that did it was apparently of no significance .

On the 4th June, 1944, the U-505 was depth charged and forced to the surface by a destroyer that was part of a US task force built around a 'jeep' aircraft carrier, the USS Guadalcanal.



A boarding party from the US destroyer Pilsbury captured the U-505 and she was successfully towed to Bermuda. The U-boat crew were kept isolated from other prisoners in an attempt to make sure that the capture of a naval enigma machine didn't leak out.



Previous successes in obtaining enigma documents and/or machine parts at sea were carried out by the Royal Navy.



12th February, 1940, U-33 sunk.



26th April, 1940, German Trawler Polares captured.



4th March, 1941, German Trawler March Krebs captured.



7th May, 1941, German weather ship Munchen captured.



9th May, 1941, U-110, captured.



4th June, 1941, German supply ship Gedania captured.



28th June, 1941, German weather ship Lauenburg captured.



27th August, 1941, U-570 captured.



26-27th December, 1941. During the Commando raid on the Lofoten islands three more German trawlers are captured.



30th October, 1942, two British seamen drown during removal of documents from sinking U-559.



17th February, 1943, U-205 captured.

There was some criticism of the CO of USS Guadalcanal because he thought that being gung-ho and bringing home the U boat as a trophy was more important than concealing from the enemy that his people had been able to board. Not the sharpest knife in the box perhaps. .

Originally Posted by Chef

The colour re-make of 'All quiet on the western front'

If it ain't broke don't fix it!

I've also caught up with Enemy at the gate, ye Gods! I didn't do sniping, but even I wondered about positions with no alternative exit, going to get dog tags, etc etc, and no snow! How Jude Law got a reputation as an actor amazes me.

I don't think Law had any imput into tactics, or the historical innacuracies

Originally Posted by littlejim

Originally Posted by Border_Reiver

Originally Posted by weekend_worrier

'Behind Enemy Lines 2!'

The first one was pretty s**t as well. .......
.

......... Further the Americans made a film , U 571 , about Enigma in which they captured an Enigma Machine from a German Submarine .... the fact that it was we , the Brits , that did it was apparently of no significance .

On the 4th June, 1944, the U-505 was depth charged and forced to the surface by a destroyer that was part of a US task force built around a 'jeep' aircraft carrier, the USS Guadalcanal.



A boarding party from the US destroyer Pilsbury captured the U-505 and she was successfully towed to Bermuda. The U-boat crew were kept isolated from other prisoners in an attempt to make sure that the capture of a naval enigma machine didn't leak out.



Previous successes in obtaining enigma documents and/or machine parts at sea were carried out by the Royal Navy.



12th February, 1940, U-33 sunk.



26th April, 1940, German Trawler Polares captured.



4th March, 1941, German Trawler March Krebs captured.



7th May, 1941, German weather ship Munchen captured.



9th May, 1941, U-110, captured.



4th June, 1941, German supply ship Gedania captured.



28th June, 1941, German weather ship Lauenburg captured.



27th August, 1941, U-570 captured.



26-27th December, 1941. During the Commando raid on the Lofoten islands three more German trawlers are captured.



30th October, 1942, two British seamen drown during removal of documents from sinking U-559.



17th February, 1943, U-205 captured.

Thanks for that correction to my post I was not aware of the one , late in the War capture by the American Navy of an Enigma Machine .

In the Errol Flynn version of charge of the light brigade they set it after the indian mutiny

Yep, seems so. Thing is, events like were portrayed in the early part of the film did occur long before the Indian Mutiny as such kicked off. Particularly in the Afghanistan/North West Frontier.

Tam

For my sins, I attempted to watch Heartbreak Ridge last night - the Clint Eastwood pic about a USMC Recon unit in training.

It is staggeringly bad on practically every level - the golden turd of war films.

I dare say jumpinjarhead (of this parish) could give us the lowdown about how many spectacular gaffes it contains, but the general premise is this:

A bunch of young bodybuilders, retards and rock musicians get trained by a whispering Gunny Eastwood in the arts of war. They go on parade wearing jewellry and avoid any of that demeaning 'sir no sir' banter. The worst that happens to them if they make a mistake, such as a spectacular ND on a range, is they get called an 'asshole'. They have t-shirt competitions and are a chilled out bunch of dudes, who can treat their drill sgt like a kind of hired help with no chance of being beasted.

They don't bother with training, but seem to have absorbed enough expertise by the end of their long weekend in camp to invade Grenada without difficulty and bring a little bit of Peoria's magic to those naughty men in the Carribean.

Shurely the USMC is nothing at all like this in reality?

I too watched Heartbreak Ridge last night and managed to overlook the shite acting, lack of realism and clichéd sequences, I mean FFS they even have a cocktail party which gets cut short due to them being mobilised, how many films has that happened in?

Anyway, the fact remains that the film contains some of the greatest quotes ever recorded, this is Clint at his very best:

''My name's Gunnery Sergeant Highway and I've drunk more beer and banged more quiff and pissed more blood and stomped more ass that all of you numbnuts put together.''

''Well, well, well, well. I'm here to tell you that life as you knew it has ended. You all may as well go into town tonight. You may as well laugh and make fools out of yourselves. Rub your pathetic little peckers against your honies or stick it in a knothole in the fence but whatever it is, get rid of it. Because at 0600 tomorrow your ass is mine.''

''Be advised. I'm mean, nasty and tired. I eat concertina wire and piss napalm and I can put a round in a flea's ass at 200 meters. So why don't you go hump somebody else's leg, mutt face, before I push yours in.''

''This is the AK-47 assault rifle, the preferred weapon of your enemy; and it makes a distinctive sound when fired at you, so remember it. ''

''I been pumping pussy since Christ was a corporal. I can tell you, the best damned poontang I ever paid for was in Da Nang. The girls were checked out daily. And we got ourself laid in a safe, orderly, proficient, military manner. That is until some suckhead writes home mama and says he dipped his wick in the Republic of South Vietnam. Then the shit hits the fan. A committee of congressmen who asshole to asshole who couldn't make a beer fart in a whirlwind, start telling your basic-ass-in-the-grass, Marine " No more short time ". We responded in true Marine Corps fashion. We salute, do an about face, double time back to the boom-boom garbage dump where we get the clap, and the drip, and the crabs and a generally poor attitude towards the female of the species. War is hell, boy. That's a fact! ''

Originally Posted by Ravers

I too watched Heartbreak Ridge last night and managed to overlook the shite acting, lack of realism and clichéd sequences, I mean FFS they even have a cocktail party which gets cut short due to them being mobilised, how many films has that happened in?

Anyway, the fact remains that the film contains some of the greatest quotes ever recorded, this is Clint at his very best:

''My name's Gunnery Sergeant Highway and I've drunk more beer and banged more quiff and pissed more blood and stomped more ass that all of you numbnuts put together.''

''Well, well, well, well. I'm here to tell you that life as you knew it has ended. You all may as well go into town tonight. You may as well laugh and make fools out of yourselves. Rub your pathetic little peckers against your honies or stick it in a knothole in the fence but whatever it is, get rid of it. Because at 0600 tomorrow your ass is mine.''

''Be advised. I'm mean, nasty and tired. I eat concertina wire and piss napalm and I can put a round in a flea's ass at 200 meters. So why don't you go hump somebody else's leg, mutt face, before I push yours in.''

''This is the AK-47 assault rifle, the preferred weapon of your enemy; and it makes a distinctive sound when fired at you, so remember it. ''

''I been pumping pussy since Christ was a corporal. I can tell you, the best damned poontang I ever paid for was in Da Nang. The girls were checked out daily. And we got ourself laid in a safe, orderly, proficient, military manner. That is until some suckhead writes home mama and says he dipped his wick in the Republic of South Vietnam. Then the shit hits the fan. A committee of congressmen who asshole to asshole who couldn't make a beer fart in a whirlwind, start telling your basic-ass-in-the-grass, Marine " No more short time ". We responded in true Marine Corps fashion. We salute, do an about face, double time back to the boom-boom garbage dump where we get the clap, and the drip, and the crabs and a generally poor attitude towards the female of the species. War is hell, boy. That's a fact! ''

Good lines, Ravers, but watching Eastwood squeeze 'em out just makes him look like a bit of a c0ck, imho. Robert E Ermey (Full Metal Jacket) is the only actor who can get away with the drill sgt cliche.

You can imagine the script conferences for Heartbreak Ridge. "Hey, let's get real. Let's get Clint's character to call that recruit an 'asswipe'. Soldiers talk like that all the time, according to my uncle Vinny, who was in the ROTC".

"Let's be controversial and have Clint call that other recruit 'a faggot'. Hell yeah! Hooo AAAh".

Pile of dung in my view, despite your diligent script research.

Valkyrie (200 with Tom Cruise, possibly the worst film I’ve ever seen and certainly the worst warish movie I’ve seen. It’s that bad it pushes Top Gun by the same hopeless actor into 2nd place. That man really is the worst actor to ever grace the screen. On the other side of the coin, my vote for best has to be: Hitler, The Rise of Evil with Robert Carlyle. Carlyle is a genius and definitely does the best Hitler ever. And The Pianist with Adrien Brody is another great movie. Can’t believe someone mentioned Enemy at the Gates... tis a brilliant movie. I do love many of the old classics too Battle of Britain, Dambusters and one of my long terms favourites: Lawrence of Arabia.