I don't mind Coldplay. Clearly it's deeply unfashionable to admit such a thing but like going in to McDonald's the world over, you know what you're going to get, some of it's pretty offensive, some of it are staples of the menu and some of it is, well, quite appealing in certain situations. I can't listen to them in the house but don't mind listening to them on a long drive, much like Mickey Ds really although obviously I don't listen to a cheeseburger.

Anyway. I remember in an interview that Bonio referred to Chris Martin as a lyricist of 'remarkable subtlety' at which point I nearly choked on my Big Mac, I mean has he actually ever listened to anything written by Chris Martin? Even Martin admits his lyrics aren't that great and after listening to Paradise on Mylo Xyloto, he's absolutely spot on with that admission. Check this out (my highlights for exceptional banality):


When she was just a girl
She expected the world
But it flew away from her reach so
She ran away in her sleep
and dreamed of
Para-para-paradise, Para-para-paradise, Para-para-paradise
Every time she closed her eyes

When she was just a girl
She expected the world
But it flew away from her reach
and the bullets catch in her teeth
Life goes on, it gets so heavy
The wheel breaks the butterfly
Every tear a waterfall
In the night the stormy night she'll close her eyes
In the night the stormy night away she'd fly

and dreams of
Para-para-paradise
Para-para-paradise
Para-para-paradise

Oh oh oh oh oh oh-oh-oh
She'd dream of
Para-para-paradise
Para-para-paradise
Para-para-paradise
Oh oh oh oh oh oh-oh-oh-oh

lalalalalalalalalalala
And so lying underneath those stormy skies
She'd say, "oh, ohohohoh I know the sun must set to rise"

This could be
Para-para-paradise
Para-para-paradise
Para-para-paradise
Oh oh oh oh oh oh-oh-oh
This could be
Para-para-paradise
Para-para-paradise
This could be
Para-para-paradise
Oh oh oh oh oh oh-oh-oh-oh

How fucking bollocks is that little lot? Fourteen year old girls the world over churn out this sort of cliched shit a million times a day so how is it this tube is still in the band and how the hell did the rest of his bandmates not fall over pissing themselves laughing when he came up with these pearlers?

I'm not a big fan on Coldplay. I find Chris Martin to be a lefty twat. That said, I quite like "Paradise"

Annoying isn't it? I want to hate it but I can't get the bloody tune out of my head.

Originally Posted by Forastero

Annoying isn't it? I want to hate it but I can't get the bloody tune out of my head.

Exactly that. I was discussing it with my sister last weekend. It's quite catchy, even if the lyrics are shite. It would be great if it weren't sung by Coldplay.

I hated Coldplay simply because CM married a movie star, calls his daughter a stupid name and has insulation tape round his fingers, but I digress. I now tolerate them after listening to the Vida la Loca album, what can I say - its very good.

Originally Posted by Forastero

Annoying isn't it? I want to hate it but I can't get the bloody tune out of my head.

I want to hate it, so I do.

I hate Coldsore even more than Status Quo,,,,,

Chris Martin has to be a "lefty twat" or at least seem to be, allow me to explain. If he said he was a nasty tory, hang'em flog'em, shoot foxes and badgers etc. He wouldn't get any further air time especially from the socialist beeb. He would be mocked and sneered at by trendy leftee mouth piece shows eg buzzcocks and H.I.G.N.F.Y and those fecking dreadful-obvious punch line stand up shows that are broadcast 24/7.
Take that James Blunt fella, posh back ground ex officer mates with Wills and the ginger one, will never be taken seriously in UK. Although his music is utter dross and he does mock himself.
Well whatever we think of Mr Martin he does get or at least did shag G Paltrow (sorry I can't spell Gwynth?)

Even the track where Rihanna is on is alright (God, I hate myself) and they sampled one of my favourite bands, Sigur Ros. Can't criticise their lyrics though cos it's all in Icelandic yip-yap.

They copied Kraftwerk's computer world
Coldplay vs. Kraftwerk - YouTube