I've received some very helpful PMs tonight, but I thought that one of them would merit a public reply. No names needed, but someone said "didn't dare mention PTSD as I didn't think I'd earned it".

Like you I've never dared to suggest PTSD because I don't feel I've earned it. I never mobilised but when I first read about PTSD I started to consider possible causes. I began to remember numerous occasions throughout my childhood and up to my mid twenties that could have contributed.

The earliest occasion was I was about 8/9. I was just kicking around on a Sunday afternoon when I was approached by a lad of about 14/15. I vaguely knew him as a neighbour, he lived a few streets away, and I think his younger brother went to my school. He invited me to come visit his gran who had loads of sweets in the house. When we got there she was out, and within 30 seconds so was his cock. He started estimating the size of mine and urged me to follow his example. I was terrified. I had a rabbit in headlights moment, before muttering something about the promised sweets. Eventually he lost interest, put his pork sword away and went to rummage through biscuit tins. After all that all he offered me was a packet of Salt and Vinegar crisps. I made my excuses and got out of there sharpish.

About 4 years later I had a run in with a gang of kids I used to know. Something about school rivalry (like I actually cared, I didn't like my school or anyone elses), me giving them the Vs, them giving me a slapping. More embarassing than painful, but scary at the time I suppose.

I got mugged once. Not much point going into details, but I always beat myself up for not having fought back enough. Same with a random assault in a nightclub a few years later. Someone knocked me to the floor while I was having a slash, then applied his shoe to my face. I was later informed by a witness that the perpetrator was the local psycho hardnut and I'd annoyed him with a funny look.

Add to that a good sprinkling of idiotic dares and lack of road sense that thankfully didn't even leave a mark. I was probably lucky to be alive.

I'm not trying to one-up anyone. Posting in a public forum is helpful, theraputic, It's not a cure but it seems to be a step in the right direction. I'm going to phone the quack on Monday and get the professional ball rolling.

Stokey, PTSD comes in various guises, and what phazes one person doesn't seem to matter to another. From what I gather it is more a cumulative thing, it isn't necessarily just a single incident but the sum of a series. Everyone who has suffered it has earned it, just sometimes you earn it by installments.

Medical support is essential, if the doctor prescribes something for you, then do follow through with the treatment he has prescribed.

I am absolutely 100% confident in saying that things will start to look better when you've had time to think and assimilate your situation. You do have mates, albeit that we may be spread out all over and albeit that we have never met and may never do so. You will bounce back, and it's time to start planning for when (and not if) this happens.

Are you ex forces Stokey?
Are you homeless from tuesday?

believe he is ex TA

Shouldn't the arrse fund be swinging into gear about now then?

Originally Posted by actiontoday

Are you ex forces Stokey?
Are you homeless from tuesday?

I was in the TA a long time ago. Yes, have to be out of the house by Tuesday.

I've had a lot of PMs about PTSD. I mentioned it in my first post because I think I possibly have it, but I'm far from sure. My main problems right now are the breakup of my marriage and becoming homeless. The marriage broke up because of the changes in my personality. My wife is a fantastic woman who has struggled to make the situation work, but she is on her chinstrap.

In the last 6 months I've struggled to find work because of my location and lack of car. I've been turned down for a few jobs because employers have thought I was overqualified. It will be harder to get a job without a home address.

Originally Posted by actiontoday

Shouldn't the arrse fund be swinging into gear about now then?

Thanks, but I there are more deserving cases. Any information on hostels, work, good areas to try, will all be gratefully recieved.

Any update/news, anyone?

Originally Posted by pyrogenica

Any update/news, anyone?

seconded, did he manage to find a hostel etc?

Hello,

Thanks to everyone who offered support and advice. It really helped. My situation has improved drastically since I started the this thread. At the eleventh hour I got hold of a friend who was willing to house me until I am financially able to support myself.

While living there I've applied for every job I thought I could blag, and about 5 weeks ago I actually got one of the better ones. I'm now working as a draughtsman again. I'm well out of my depth, as it's been over 10 years since I did this, but the company I work for have a very specialised product and expect most people to need some time to adjust. I'm really enjoying the challenge. I usually arrive about 30 minutes early and immediately start work, and I usually work through my lunch break. Thanks to the job I should be debt free in 2-3 months.

I saw a doctor a few months back. Although I got there early, she was running late, and didn't want to waste time hearing about my problems - "Hurry up, I've got a funeral to go to". I nearly kicked the old bitch to death. In the 3 minutes she managed to diagnose me with depression. I'm currently looking for another doctor.

I don't have regular internet access, so I won't be a regular on ARRSE for a while, but I hope to be back before Christmas. See you in the NAAFI.