Quite simply, he's a confidence trickster. In Yorkshire he would be known as a c unt. End of. He isn't just a walt any more. He's carried this on for at least 30 years. I want to see him in court with Council that he has lied to.
So here is the challenge Jimbo. Sue me. Put your money where your mouth is. In the mean time, I'll keep referring to you as 'c unt'.

.. well it is the first of April

Piccie HERE but having difficulty downloading it

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Bling-experts: He normally wears the St Gregory around the neck but this one has a different laurel, thistle, clover kind of thing above... aah forget it, I just wanted to post the picture of the bird in her ratcatcher outfit. Sorry.

The bit above the St Gregory is just a fancy braided collar-fastening for the jacket. You used to be able to buy them in Woolworths

The Rat-Catcher might be The Queen of Estonia, for all I know or care

I would like to thank my Mummy for all these awards, without her buying them for me, I wouldn't have any.

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can anyone explain how the hell you can do a counter sniper course? i mean what are you supposed to do, lie there and wait for the other sniper to stand and stretch himself off? just wondering as "Baron" c(o)untleshortt is running a counter sniper course.

It might just be me, but does she (or maybe somebody else) have a crafty hand up his kilt? Look at the way it's sort of pulled up to the side.

MsG

Maybe he's dry humping her leg

Simple! There are three main methods taught on the "Jungle Jim counter sniper course"
1. Cloud their minds with your Ninja stealth haze technique (advanced)
2. Employ natural camouflage... (e.g. Baron Shortt himself blends seamlessly into an environment full of tw@ts)
3. RUN AWAY VERY FAST!

Of course, if any of these methods fail and you get shot by a sniper you can claim your money back

Counter sniper is a Day of the Jackal tribute he conjures up in memory of Lucien Ott. In reality a BG has no chance protecting his client against a sniper, especially as a .50 would go through both BG and Client and still take out the engine block of the limo!

In that case I would be delighted to see Mr Shortt demonstrating the correct way for a BG to stand between a client and a sniper firing a .50. Live rounds of course! (the part of the client can be taken by a mannequin)...

In your own time Shortty

Ah, but no match for the superduper unfolding brief case though, ala Jimbo's video sketch

And let us not forget the gay white umbrellas

And of course the jap-slapping "Force":

Sniper: "Locked on"

BG Shortt: "These are not the targets you seek"

Sniper: "These are not the targets I seek"

BG Shortt: "move along now"

Sniper: "I'll move along now.."

BG Shortt: "You will not harm my client"

Sniper: "I will not harm your...BLAM!....Ha ha, you muppet Shortt"

BG Shortt: "Oh Feck, I'm off...."

Damn - I forgot about the white umbrellas and the magic brief case - if he goes for wearing sombreros potential assassins may as well give up and go join a monastery!

Just "googled" bulletproof briefcase, none of the results seem to match Shortties.

A few samples;

www.bulletproofclothin...riefcases/
www.zahal.org/ballistic/p02.htm

You forgot to put in "Magic Ninja bulletproof briefcase" in your google search

Ah yes! That's the one with the speshul tinfoil.